The idea of not having a purpose causes millions of people to feel depressed because, without purpose, they don't feel valued. But the more you try to find your purpose, the more unhappy you become with yourself.

Why You Can’t Find Your Purpose

The idea of not having a purpose causes millions of people to feel depressed because, without purpose, they don’t feel valued. Feeling valued is a big part of feeling alive and well as a human being. And so finding our purpose seems paramount. But unfortunately, the more you search for purpose, the more unhappy you become with yourself. It seems a catch-22 until you realize that finding your purpose is like searching for your keys when they’re in your pocket.

Read more about Why Unrealized Purpose is Painful

Social media advertisers and self-help gurus prey on your desire to feel valued. If they can keep you coming back over and over looking for your purpose, then they have you trapped in an endless loop of living in the future and trying new things to “find” your happiness. They’re happy to sell you the answers. There are hundreds of books, articles, videos, and podcasts giving advice on how to find this elusive thing called purpose when it’s not even missing…not for you, not for anyone.

You don’t have to go looking for it or digging any deeper to find it. Your purpose is already in you now. It’s in your blood and leaking out at the seams. Every skill you now possess, every thought you have, every word you utter are part of an evolutionary process that is creating and using your purpose already. If you’re looking, you just aren’t aware.

If you were aware, you could make yourself notice it, feel it and reap the benefits of knowing you already have value.

On a recent six-hour drive home from vacationing in Michigan, my daughter and I were talking about our biggest fears. We both agreed that not knowing if we were on the right track or living our purpose was scary. We’d both been there at one point in our lives. But luckily we both also came to realize that our purpose (and our value) aren’t attached to jobs or people.

Purpose is your Soul’s desire to be authentically who you are in every moment. It’s about being real with other people and expressing what you feel. Purpose is how you show up in life for yourself and for others.

The more you try to find your purpose, the more unhappy you become with yourself. The idea of not having a purpose causes millions of people every day to feel depressed because, without purpose, they don't feel valued. Your purpose happens every day. You’re always living your purpose. You can either be intentional about what you’re able to do now (without judgment) or wallow in your fears about not being good enough to make a difference. Because in every living interaction, there is potential to demonstrate why you’re here. To be kind, supportive, lift people, engage people, love the unlovable, say yes, dry the tears, be the positive force in the room, lend a hand, buy the coffee, crack a joke, create beauty, make friends easily, spread joy, open the door, smile, speak the truth, offer a hug, listen closely, stand for justice and fairness, share what you have, cherish your tribe, practice generosity, and always, I mean always…serve your best wine!

The truth? You can’t find your purpose, because it isn’t apart from you. It isn’t missing. Purpose lives in the now when you use what you already have to make a difference. Purpose requires that you become more aware of who you are and what is wanted and needed all around you, NOW at this moment, not tomorrow. Honor your beautiful gifts, the really small ones that matter to those you’re surrounded by right now, at work, at home, in the classroom, at the mall. Everywhere you go, look for ways to show others the best of who you are and what you’re capable of.

Knowing you are valuable and acting on that in really small ways adds up to how you live your purpose, one day at a time, one action, word, and thought at a time. Through this, you come to realize your true value. It really is that easy. Give it a try and let me know how it goes.

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