Learn to Love the Unexpected

visualizationWe live, fueled by desire. We envision our futures. We make lists to call in the perfect mate.  We artfully craft vision boards depicting the perfect life with pictures of places we want to go, things we want to see, and experiences we want to have. We daydream and visualize, hope and pray that one day we will have the life we envision.

We are learning to be conscious co-creators with life. This is something to celebrate! Keep up the good work, but don’t forget to stop and smell the roses blooming right now, where you are.

I’ve practiced visualization for a while, and over time have learned an important lesson – how to love the unexpected. My life, overall, has turned out pretty great, even though much of what I have to show for it doesn’t really look like anything I glued or pasted to my vision board. My relationships don’t match the lists I wrote calling them in. The places I’ve been and people I’ve met have come as a total surprise…a good one at that.

I’ve come to realize that my experiences show up randomly and usually far exceed what I could have ever imagined on my own.

I’ve learned over time to accept and love what the Universe sends me.

Take for example my friends. When I was younger, I always sought out the most popular and attractive people to hang with. I compromised my own integrity to fit in with them. I said and did things so they would like me and accept me.

I came to discover that they didn’t like me that much. And they could never really accept me because I wasn’t really being me. I manufactured a persona I thought they would like. The trouble was that over time, it was a persona I could never like. This strategy caused me a lot of pain and frustration for a while. I felt lonely a lot.

Finally, I stopped trying to earn friends and I learned instead to “be a friend.”

Eventually, the Universe brought me together with the most unexpected people. People who I needed to learn from and people who needed me in some way. I never would have included their faces on my vision board. They weren’t the people I envisioned.

Many of them are not like me. We don’t dress alike. We’re not the same age. We come from different backgrounds. But as I have come to know them, they are perfect for me in every way. They are supportive and encouraging. They see me for who I am – flaws, foibles and all…and still they love me. In fact they help me find the confidence to become more of who I was meant to be. Sometimes they also challenge me to be a better version of who I can be. That’s how I know they are real.

Doing Life the Hard Way:

When we try to micro-manage and control what the components of life are supposed to look like, we overlook and disregard much of what the Universe presents in our favor. We end up struggling and hustling to try to make things work that probably shouldn’t. We exhaust ourselves banging on doors that were not meant to open for us. We almost always pay a price for forcing or demanding that life unfold as we expect it to. That price is often quite painful.

Doing Life the Easy Way:

When we learn to love the unexpected, we open our hearts and minds to a closer version of the life we desire. When we stop placing limitations on how, and who, and what exactly we’ll accept, then we begin to see more available than we ever imagined. We increase our options when we let go of the details and requirements. When we embrace the mystery and surprise that life is, it begins to feel a little more like a celebration – like every day is our birthday. When we allow life to unfold on its own, we realize the perfection in all the gifts the Universe has in store for us.


  1. Jackie

    As a child we heard to have friends become a better friend. True. Acceptance of ourselves is difficult as we find our own path to be accepted. Only we ourselves can make our lives shine bright. There will be rainy days helping us grow looking for sunshine on those days.

  2. Renee

    I have learned the unexpected is sometimes a pleasant surprise 🙂 Happy Day – Enjoy!

  3. Yes, I like your point that the rainy days teach us to look for sunshine even when it seems remote. Nice.

  4. I agree. It is definitely, even if it doesn’t seem like it at first. Thanks for reading!!

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.