Freedom: You Can Fly!
Although I wanted to experience freedom for what seemed like forever, I couldn’t figure out how to make it happen in my life. It seemed elusive, a luxury only for the lucky few born with enough money they didn’t have to work. Freedom to me was a dream, but one I continued to chase.
Recently, I sat with a coaching client looking for someone to convince her it was okay for her to want a life of creative freedom, and that she had what it takes to create it. I knew she did. But she pretended she didn’t. When we’re feeling stumped about life, it’s common for us to reach out to others, to seek permission to have what we really want. We want someone else to affirm it’s okay to desire more out of life than we have.
As we talked, our conversation took me back to a time when I too wanted someone, anyone to give me the answers. I wanted freedom. I wanted to fly!! I just didn’t know how. In the same way my client struggled to formulate her thoughts about it, I couldn’t even articulate what I wanted, so frightened was I of my own desire. No amount of assurance from anyone could convince me that I could do it.
When we’re in this state, although desire is knocking at our front door, sadly, we’re just not ready to fly. We haven’t yet developed the kind of wings that can carry us. We may feel frustrated by a longing we can’t seem to fulfill and haunted by a desire we’re not able to name. I remember the feeling vividly.
If you’re not ready to fly, you can certainly feel it and it doesn’t feel great. In fact it may feel like you’re being blocked or held back in some way. You might think life isn’t fair.
But somehow I knew (as we all do) that if I kept on trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together, kept knocking on doors, turning right and left in the maze of my life, that I would find my way to freedom. I would not give up or give in to easy excuses. And it was in the pushing through and past the barriers before me that I built wings strong enough to fly.
I want you to feel what it’s like to spread your wings and soar. Although I can’t take away the process you need to strengthen your wings, I can share with you what I learned in hopes that it might encourage you to keep on going. Feeling free to really fly requires confidence in yourself, something a lot of us need to acquire over time, through trial and error.
Confidence can be gained by focusing your life efforts on the following:
Dare to be yourself. Learn to approve of yourself, even the parts you tend to judge as unacceptable or not enough. Learn to love the “less thans,” the things you continually judge as being less than that of others. Stop comparing, blaming and shaming because all of these rob you of authenticity. Try not to prove anything to anyone about who you are, what you want, or what you are doing with your life. Instead, pull up your socks, lift your chin and walk bravely forward in the direction of your dreams.
Courage comes from believing in your authentic self. Trusting yourself and the call of your soul’s desire take time. Disbelief may show up initially as not knowing what you want. We tend to be in denial when we’re afraid. You may not possess a natural belief in your own dreams or your ability, but you can improve your beliefs with affirmations and prayer. Stop waiting for others to approve of what you want to do or be. Be your own cheerleader. Talk to yourself often about what you can do. Build on that.
Granting Yourself Permission:
Say yes to your desire. Stop telling yourself you can’t. Simply say YES, without knowledge as to how or when. That’s having faith. Once you fully commit, there are a hundred better ways to engage your desire with permission. Here are a few examples: I will find a way. I’m learning about who I am and what I’m capable of. I’m willing to wait. One step is all I have to take. I’m curious how this will unfold. I have what I need for today’s step. I can learn. I’m on my way. It’s okay to be a beginner.
Learning to let go.
Fear can keep us teetering on the edge for so long. We want to hang onto safety, to what we consider normal, but normal is a chain that keeps us tethered to the average life. Learning to let go of control and fears that keep us grounded takes time and awareness. It’s okay to spend as much time as you need on the edge, but just keep reminding yourself of why you’re there. You’re getting ready to fly.
All of us can fly. Freedom is as much a state of mind as it is a state of being. When we fully believe in who we are and why we are here, freedom grants us the time, space, and confidence to unfold our wings and take flight. Contrary to my early line of thinking, freedom isn’t reserved for the wealthy or people who needn’t work. Freedom is available to anyone who can keep their eyes on the horizon with hope and excitement.
Let’s Celebrate our Freedom!!
Today’s post is in celebration of my one-year anniversary of leaving full-time employment. May 10th, 2017, I quit my full-time, salaried position, making the shift to become a full-time writer, free from the constraints of external expectations. From the moment I knew that I wanted a life of creative freedom, it took me nearly four years to build up enough belief and confidence in myself and the Universe to be ready. I had to get past the hurdles of distractions, fears, lack of faith, and uncertainty. I had to be willing to accept responsibility for total failure. I had to believe I could get through whatever arose without knowing what, or when, or how. I had to be willing to try, to be wrong, to regroup and try again.
And here I am a year later, flying high and loving the view!
Thank you, as always my friends, for reading.
Do you have a freedom story to tell? Please share it in the comments below. You never know how your experience might help someone else struggling to find their way.
In Light and Love,